Loo Read
 It could have been called the Eartha Kitt Daily, or perhaps the Brad Pitt News…but to come up with a name that is so perfect in every conceivable way is just magic.
Never since Churchill came up with the quote for lighting one’s exhaust fumes has a name so apt been chosen.
“The f@rt is like a giant boiler. Once the fire is lighted under it, there is no limit to the power it can generate” - Source
OK, OK, so Churchill didn’t say those exact words, but you get the gist of it.
The Loo Read is a must buy for anyone who loves spending every breathing second of their spare time couped up in the lavatory catching up on yesterday’s news. Great as a gift, even if it IS for yourself!
At £59.99 from LazyboneUK it seems slghtly on the expensive side, but then again I guess half of the profits go to the person who thought up the product name. And jimini cricket do they deserve it.
Source via  LazyBoneUK
Shockolate Vault
Absolute Genius idea.
Hide all your expensive Thorntons chocolate Alpinis in this jar, set the timer then sit back all smug as your desperate chocaholic girlfriend whinces in pain every time she tries to get at one of the chocolates.
The jar is programmed to send a mild electric shock if anyone attempts to open the jar before the allocated time has expired.
Costing a sweet £10 from Crazyaboutgadgets.com this will give you literally, minutes worth of fun. You could even put your cigarette stash in there if you’re trying to quit.
My only advice:-  do not, I repeat, do NOT put a small stupid pet in the jar - cos that would not be big or clever.